Well over a year ago, I met a dame… Sweet Honey Smack and developed one no-joke-straight-girl crush. It’s pretty rare to meet a dame as special as Sweet Honey Smack. She’s talented, intelligent and funny. A gifted writer with a background in counseling and dispensing much needed advice about sex, romance, life, love, our bodies and body language. We decided to partner—it was a natural. And, here we are today, Sweet Honey Smack and Aspasia Fern! We complement each other beautifully.
Get to know Honey and you will love her, too. Read the below interview and learn all about the goddess that is Sweet Honey Smack!
- Honey, you are one of the most sexually evolved women I’ve ever met. You’re very comfortable with your sexuality, was this learned or have you always been that way?
Why thank you Ms! You’re too kind! Being comfortable with my sexuality was something that was learned after a long-term relationship where I had as much sexual stimulation as a mop on laundry day. For the most part like a dry and unused mop, I was neglected. It wasn’t until I was in my late 20’s that I began to bloom sexually and discover and try different ideas that had been buried very deep. From that time on, I was a ripe peach ready to be juiced. Repeatedly.
- You write very sensuous, erotic essays. Where do you get your inspiration?
Most of my inspiration comes from fond memories of lovers that have come and gone – excuse the pun. Each person brought a different flavour to the honeysmack boudoir and they all provided something delectable to my ever-evolving prose now as a blogger. A couple of my lovers currently read the Smack Dab in the Middle and enjoy the trip down memory lane.
- What are your most favorite essays?
My favourite essays are the sex series part 1, 2 and three. They’re raw, unedited and written with detail that’s caused my site-meter to go through the roof. I had to confer with the ex-lover to finalise some minute details but they’re by far the more erotic of the ones I’ve written so far. I’ve found my regular band of readers each identify or prefer different stories for their own personal reasons. I once received an email from a couple who read my stories and re-enacted them with much success. I was rapt to get a 'thankyou' email from them
- What erotic writers out there have encouraged you?
When I was about 28, I started to read Anais Nin, Erica Jong and of course Henry Miller. They were revolutionary to their time and turned me on in modern times. One of my most brilliant lovers introduced me to Anais Nin and Ill be forever grateful. I really enjoyed seeing a woman [of her time] so boldly and brazen in her words. She inspired me! As a horny teenager, I use to masturbate to the stories in my boyfriend's Playboy magazines too.
- When you write, the point of view is always that of a sexually empowered woman who always gets her “O”. Can you elaborate on the importance of that a bit?
In this day, we’re all living fast-paced lifestyle, it’s easy for an average woman to forget her needs when she’s got to think about her partner, the kids, if she’s fed the dog, the washing on the line and that report that’s due on the boss’ desk on Monday. I feel that if a woman demands sexuality equality in the bedroom, having the big O can take the pressure of a strained relationship and make her sleep well enough to tackle the day ahead tomorrow.
Also, a lot of women are feeling high scrutiny to the constant barrage of perfect images that are portrayed by the media of what a woman should be. When our partner rubs, licks and sucks long enough to remind her that she’s the center of their world, it’s reassuring to know we’re worth it. My experience and feedback tells me that a man loves a sexually empowered woman. It'll turn him on to know he's turning you on. They hate dead fish - it ruins their ego.
- What advice would you give to a woman who wanted to write erotic essays?
I think the biggest obstacle comes from self-doubt or an unfounded belief in a stereotype. “I’m not sexy enough’ or “I’m just a housewife’ or worse ‘what if the neighbours find out?” the answer? Who cares! If you want to unpack and share those deep-seated sexy thoughts, do it. There is no training. No Style to follow. You simply describe the feelings as best you can, throw in the scene description and tantalise your readers by giving the most important ingredient of all… reality. I would suggest that you only write about having wild monkey sex in the Swiss Alps with Fabio’s hair covering your sweaty, perfect lip-gloss if you’ve already nailed Fabio. So open an anonymous Blog that only you and your partner know about. Write in explicit details protecting your location and real names. Send your partner your latest post to their office and watch them come running at 5pm.
- Where does your sexpiration come from?
My stories are all true. Well, except one and you know, my readers picked it? Yup! I mostly write when I’m feeling horny or when I’m having a particularly stimulating memory about a hot sex adventure. Sometimes I have very un-sexy moments when I’m trudging around the house vacuuming and feeling very unfuckable. We are real women, remember.
I remember a fond kiss and the daydream starts. Then I start remembering specifics and voila~ I sit down and type it out. It can range from a purchase of g-vibrator to a voyeuristic masturbation exchange in the lounge room. It helps that I can be so descriptive.
- If I wanted to read more of Honey’s work, where would I find it online?
It isn’t much but its mine. Please visit www.honeysmack.blogspot.com. It’s important to note that not all of my posts are based about the sound of my love cavern getting some pink sword. Please come and stay a while. Go through the archives or search for masturbation, sex or cock in the search engine. I'm sure you'll find something to tickle your fancy.
- Will you be authoring a book? When and where can we scoop that sweet honey smack up?
As much as I would love to have a book deal, I don’t see it happening in the foreseeable future but you know, wilder things have happened and we should be prepared for anything right? Certainly, if I ever sit down long enough I’ll keep the Blog updated on any book whispers. Imagine all the research and material I'd need to practice. Um, gather. :)
- Do you regard yourself as a feminist?
Yes I would regard myself as a feminist however, you won’t see me waving a flag or burning my bra. I do enjoy the traditional comforts that a man could bring to a relationship. He can rescue the plate-size spider for example, but he can also cook a meal every so often and check those weird noises in the night.
On the other foot, I’m all about equality of pay in the work-place, men taking responsibility for their actions and don’t talk down to me, fucker, or I’ll fry your balls for breakfast. I’m all about sexual equality in the bedroom. You won’t dine at the Café Minge? Then don’t expect a blowjob from me, baby.
10. What advice would you give to a woman seeking confidence about expressing her sexual desires?
It’s important for a woman to love her own company. When she reaches that stage, she’s choosier with whom she shares her time and thus, her standards rise. I know I’d rather sit at home by myself than have some limp-dicked fucktard boss me around or think he’s better than me. This confidence attracts a better standard of friends and lovers because ‘same attracts same.’ In my experience, if she’s confident in herself, she’s confident in expressing her sexual desires because she knows she’s worth it and shouldn’t settle for less than someone who can bring the bacon home. Why settle for Burger King when you could have Gourmet?
If you’ve tried talking to your partner and your sexual desires and he’s just not listening, write to us and we’ll give you some detailed suggestions on how to grab their attention permanently, or if s/he won’t listen; tell them to pack up their crap and make way for the one who will!
- What are your favorite curse words?
When I’m doing the horizontal mambo, I usually encourage my partner to watch his cock going in and out of my pussy. I guess my curse words are to describe the action while it’s happening. I'll tell him I can feel every inch of him or that he's stretching me. I'll tell him he's so big or I'll get drippin' wet while I suck his cock. I tell him to watch my cunt-lips puckering around him and see how slick and shiny his cock is. This normally sends them over the edge, so I suggest to only do this if you can feel a leg cramp coming on, or Grey’s Anatomy is about to start.
- How do you feel about the word “cunt”?
I do use the word cunt in the bedroom but it does depend on the partner. I wouldn't use it for just anyone. I think that word is so nasty sounding, whether you're using it in a fight or sexually. I tend to only use it for people I really hate in a fight. Sexually, I'd only use it if I knew it would not disgust the guy I was with. I do believe it is a bit taboo though and can bring out the animal in the guy you're with. Like anything, check out your audience and feel comfortable. 'Oh golly gosh, that's really feeling jolly in my vagina", doesn't cut it for me. If you can’t be comfortable shouting ‘fuck my cunt’ when you have your legs over someone’s shoulder then when can you?
